Another site just for us that really helps chart your progress. You can also talk with others, check out meds they take and print out a doctor visit sheet to use for questions. I love this site!
Sunday, February 28, 2010
My Very Necessary Medical I.D. Card
My Very Necessary Medical I.D. Card
This is the best use of 40.00 I have spent in years. I have an ID card, key card tag, 2 stickers for my car and a printout for my service dog that goes in his badge. I also got a prescription discount card.
Downloading information was easy and I have all my information in one place now. Love it!!!
Saturday, February 27, 2010
Losing weight with MS
Back in 2008 I was struggling with my weight before I got my diagnosis. I moved to Colorado from Maui where I had no car and had to walk everywhere, and before then I lived in downtown Seattle where I wanted to walk everywhere even though I had a car. All this kept me trim year round as the weather allowed for it (you get used to the rain in Seattle and walk in it daily).
So I come to Colorado to my best friends' home and she is a chef. Food is included in rent. She has a weight issue, and is struggling with many diets, but I change my diet to hers, which is very sugary, starchy and fatty. My weight went up and down, until finally she went on the Atkins Diet, and so did I.
Well I lost about 20 lbs, but I was already almost 170, so I kept going. She only lost 10 pounds and gave up, but I continued to eat complex carbs and protein.
Then I hit a wall. I was not exercising, and right about that time I got diagnosed and I was so depressed, even though I had lost 4 inches on my waist, I went up to 180. I stayed there and started tripping all the time, losing my balance and twisting my ankles. Then my GP looked me straight in the eyes and said, "Seriously, if you do not lose weight, you are only going to keep tripping and falling. Your body has to hold that weight and do many other movements which are complicated and with limb weakness, your feet drop and legs can give out on you."
So I went at it again, especially after falling so hard, what they call a drop fall, that I had no idea I had fallen (This is why I got Oliver), and I twisted my left ankle so bad it took months of physical therapy to get it to heal.
So, I switched back to complex carbs - all breads, pastas, starches of any kind are whole grain. I started eating and drinking fiber and acidophilus in my coffee and tea. I cut out sugar COMPLETELY and bought Republic of Tea's "Get Lost", which curbs sugar cravings. Finally, I got a Jillian Michaels CD (Biggest Loser) called "No more Trouble Zones", which is a low impact, high results 40 minute workout program I did 3 times a week. Below is the rest of what I did, and I have not stopped following this diet, by the way!
1) Boil 6-12 eggs at a time and peel right away. Then I put 2 each in ziploc snack bags (Got those at the dollar store);
2) Buy 1 bunch of bananas per week;
3) Buy full bars (peanut butter ones have less sugar and carbs) at Costco or on Dr. Snyder's website http://www.fullbar.com;
4) Have a refillable water bottle;
5) Jillian Michaels "No More Trouble Zones" CD (Costco has all 3 of her CD's);
6) Cut out all sugar and get Republic of Tea "Get Lost" tea.
Eat one full bar in the morning and as instructed drink water 1/2 hour before eating anything. Then eat banana or eggs. Try to eat only one. When hungry again, eat eggs (they last longer through the day).
At dinner time, eat another full bar 1/2 hour before serving. Then eat 1/2 of usual portion, but do not finish after you feel full. Do your best to stay away from sugar. Drink one cup of the tea with a splenda. This will literally kill your sugar craving. You can drink at night or anytime you crave sugar.
Exercise when you can. Try to do it 3 times a week. I do it at night as I get fatigued and want to crash. Erin bought the Wii Fit Plus and we are going to make the basement into an exercise/sewing room. Try to make your own quiet place so you can relax afterward and do the CD undisturbed. Night time might be great for mothers as the kids are in bed.
Later you can incorporate other foods. I have two slices of the highest grain and protein bread per day as a snack to help with staying regular. There is a bread at Costco but the name escapes me right now. I also eat whole grain pasta and I eat smaller amounts of it with a protein - sometimes the flavored tofu from Whole Foods or ground turkey. I eat edamame and shrimp wanton soup for dinner and maybe a veggie potsticker or two. The key is to watch the white, starchy carbs and do not let them in your house if you can help it. Another great dinner is black bean or lentil soup with 1 slice of whole grain bread. When you start to see results, you will start to make your own diet that works for you.
Finally, exercise. It is important for your health, MS, and weight loss. Warm up with a short yoga CD, which you can get at Barnes and Noble or other book stores. I love yoga; it is like my own private Idaho at home!
Don't forget, check with your doctor. The Jillian Michaels is low impact mat work similar to yoga. It took me a month to finish it. Now I can do it, but some parts I sit it out. Talk to the doctor about the diet as well. it is a balance of protein and complex carbs, which you need for energy. Bananas are great for the heart, and be sure to add a small amount of sodium to your diet as well.
This program took me a year to get where I am. All I wanted to lose was 30 lbs and I have lost 60. I now weigh 117, have better balance and have not fallen or tripped in a year. After you check with your doctor, start easy and work yourself up to the level you are comfortable with - don't quit - you will love the results!
Good luck and please send any questions to my e-mail or you may comment and I will get the e-mail that way.
So I come to Colorado to my best friends' home and she is a chef. Food is included in rent. She has a weight issue, and is struggling with many diets, but I change my diet to hers, which is very sugary, starchy and fatty. My weight went up and down, until finally she went on the Atkins Diet, and so did I.
Well I lost about 20 lbs, but I was already almost 170, so I kept going. She only lost 10 pounds and gave up, but I continued to eat complex carbs and protein.
Then I hit a wall. I was not exercising, and right about that time I got diagnosed and I was so depressed, even though I had lost 4 inches on my waist, I went up to 180. I stayed there and started tripping all the time, losing my balance and twisting my ankles. Then my GP looked me straight in the eyes and said, "Seriously, if you do not lose weight, you are only going to keep tripping and falling. Your body has to hold that weight and do many other movements which are complicated and with limb weakness, your feet drop and legs can give out on you."
So I went at it again, especially after falling so hard, what they call a drop fall, that I had no idea I had fallen (This is why I got Oliver), and I twisted my left ankle so bad it took months of physical therapy to get it to heal.
So, I switched back to complex carbs - all breads, pastas, starches of any kind are whole grain. I started eating and drinking fiber and acidophilus in my coffee and tea. I cut out sugar COMPLETELY and bought Republic of Tea's "Get Lost", which curbs sugar cravings. Finally, I got a Jillian Michaels CD (Biggest Loser) called "No more Trouble Zones", which is a low impact, high results 40 minute workout program I did 3 times a week. Below is the rest of what I did, and I have not stopped following this diet, by the way!
1) Boil 6-12 eggs at a time and peel right away. Then I put 2 each in ziploc snack bags (Got those at the dollar store);
2) Buy 1 bunch of bananas per week;
3) Buy full bars (peanut butter ones have less sugar and carbs) at Costco or on Dr. Snyder's website http://www.fullbar.com;
4) Have a refillable water bottle;
5) Jillian Michaels "No More Trouble Zones" CD (Costco has all 3 of her CD's);
6) Cut out all sugar and get Republic of Tea "Get Lost" tea.
Eat one full bar in the morning and as instructed drink water 1/2 hour before eating anything. Then eat banana or eggs. Try to eat only one. When hungry again, eat eggs (they last longer through the day).
At dinner time, eat another full bar 1/2 hour before serving. Then eat 1/2 of usual portion, but do not finish after you feel full. Do your best to stay away from sugar. Drink one cup of the tea with a splenda. This will literally kill your sugar craving. You can drink at night or anytime you crave sugar.
Exercise when you can. Try to do it 3 times a week. I do it at night as I get fatigued and want to crash. Erin bought the Wii Fit Plus and we are going to make the basement into an exercise/sewing room. Try to make your own quiet place so you can relax afterward and do the CD undisturbed. Night time might be great for mothers as the kids are in bed.
Later you can incorporate other foods. I have two slices of the highest grain and protein bread per day as a snack to help with staying regular. There is a bread at Costco but the name escapes me right now. I also eat whole grain pasta and I eat smaller amounts of it with a protein - sometimes the flavored tofu from Whole Foods or ground turkey. I eat edamame and shrimp wanton soup for dinner and maybe a veggie potsticker or two. The key is to watch the white, starchy carbs and do not let them in your house if you can help it. Another great dinner is black bean or lentil soup with 1 slice of whole grain bread. When you start to see results, you will start to make your own diet that works for you.
Finally, exercise. It is important for your health, MS, and weight loss. Warm up with a short yoga CD, which you can get at Barnes and Noble or other book stores. I love yoga; it is like my own private Idaho at home!
Don't forget, check with your doctor. The Jillian Michaels is low impact mat work similar to yoga. It took me a month to finish it. Now I can do it, but some parts I sit it out. Talk to the doctor about the diet as well. it is a balance of protein and complex carbs, which you need for energy. Bananas are great for the heart, and be sure to add a small amount of sodium to your diet as well.
This program took me a year to get where I am. All I wanted to lose was 30 lbs and I have lost 60. I now weigh 117, have better balance and have not fallen or tripped in a year. After you check with your doctor, start easy and work yourself up to the level you are comfortable with - don't quit - you will love the results!
Good luck and please send any questions to my e-mail or you may comment and I will get the e-mail that way.
Friday, February 26, 2010
The service dog
Having a therapy dog has changed my life. There are 2 kinds of working dogs: Therapy and working dog. The working dog is trained to do a host of services. Help the blind, people in wheelchairs, etc.
The therapy dog is an RX dog prescribed by your doctor. When I flew to Florida all I needed were the letter of prescription and his updated health records. My therapy dog is named Oliver. He is well trained and helps me feel safe if I fall and when I go places alone.
Oliver is a chiuaua. He was given to me as a puppy and I have trained him for this since. I get many comments on him because he is very pretty (fawn) and small. Most people do not know you can use small dogs as service dogs.
Before My diagnosis, I volunteered for the animal rescue league in Denver. I have 2 cats in the house and at the time there were 3. Since my roomie had the 2 cats and I had 1, she wanted no more animals, so I volunteered for the dog behavioral department.
I started out walking dogs. Then I could not handle the big dogs, so I would only walk the little ones. I was exhausted after 2 hours, I did not know why at the time. I then took a break and have not gone back since my diagnosis.
I learned that I never would have been able to handle a large dog as a service dog. Sometimes Oliver wears me out as he is still a dog and still does dog things. Not often, but he can get tired and I have to carry him. Then I can only do it ten minutes at a time.
I have severe anxiety as well, and he helps tremendously with that. He also helps keep me busy. After all, he is 1.5 years old now and very active. My room mate loves and adores him and plays with him often. She feels sometimes I neglect him, but unfortunately, I get fatigued and can't play with him. He is well fed, has dog insurance with the vet and I train him constantly. She does not train, feed or walk him, but I am so grateful she plays with him!
This also keeps he and I in a "master-servant" relationship. When he sees her, he gets excited whereas when he sees me he is on guard. He knows I am the stern trainer and she is the fun, playmate. My concern is that he would want to play at a time when I needed him most, such as if I fall.
Because he is certified he can go anywhere with me. I have to stave people off as he is little and cute, and some never ask if they can pet him. But the fact that he is a chiuaua and a service dog just makes them so curious and respectful of him. Imagine, seeing chiuaua's in this different light? Not the yappy, nippy dogs they are claimed to be? Oliver is not that kind of dog. He growls sometimes and barks, but it is rare, and I nip it in the but right there.
Also, as he is so small, I had to make him a vest. I did costume design when I was in my 20's. Then I ordered the patches from sitstay.com, sewed them on, and when I put the vest on, he knows it is time to work.
There are other ways to get service dogs - you can go through a service dog specialty center which could be thousands or train your own dog with certified professional trainer. For a therapy dog they must have enough training to understand and obey your commands and not use the bathroom while inside buildings. I use public transportation a lot and walk Oliver when we are outside and, of course, bring bags and treats (bully bones keep them busy for a long time).
Whatever dog you choose or wherever you chose to train it be sure it is a dog you can handle. I am fully ambulatory and can walk a dog, but my limbs are week, so I needed a smaller dog. He is perfect for me. He also lives longer than any other breed; up to 30 years! So do your research, leave any outside information and myths you have heard about any breed and do what works for you!
Good luck and happy dog hunting!
The therapy dog is an RX dog prescribed by your doctor. When I flew to Florida all I needed were the letter of prescription and his updated health records. My therapy dog is named Oliver. He is well trained and helps me feel safe if I fall and when I go places alone.
Oliver is a chiuaua. He was given to me as a puppy and I have trained him for this since. I get many comments on him because he is very pretty (fawn) and small. Most people do not know you can use small dogs as service dogs.
Before My diagnosis, I volunteered for the animal rescue league in Denver. I have 2 cats in the house and at the time there were 3. Since my roomie had the 2 cats and I had 1, she wanted no more animals, so I volunteered for the dog behavioral department.
I started out walking dogs. Then I could not handle the big dogs, so I would only walk the little ones. I was exhausted after 2 hours, I did not know why at the time. I then took a break and have not gone back since my diagnosis.
I learned that I never would have been able to handle a large dog as a service dog. Sometimes Oliver wears me out as he is still a dog and still does dog things. Not often, but he can get tired and I have to carry him. Then I can only do it ten minutes at a time.
I have severe anxiety as well, and he helps tremendously with that. He also helps keep me busy. After all, he is 1.5 years old now and very active. My room mate loves and adores him and plays with him often. She feels sometimes I neglect him, but unfortunately, I get fatigued and can't play with him. He is well fed, has dog insurance with the vet and I train him constantly. She does not train, feed or walk him, but I am so grateful she plays with him!
This also keeps he and I in a "master-servant" relationship. When he sees her, he gets excited whereas when he sees me he is on guard. He knows I am the stern trainer and she is the fun, playmate. My concern is that he would want to play at a time when I needed him most, such as if I fall.
Because he is certified he can go anywhere with me. I have to stave people off as he is little and cute, and some never ask if they can pet him. But the fact that he is a chiuaua and a service dog just makes them so curious and respectful of him. Imagine, seeing chiuaua's in this different light? Not the yappy, nippy dogs they are claimed to be? Oliver is not that kind of dog. He growls sometimes and barks, but it is rare, and I nip it in the but right there.
Also, as he is so small, I had to make him a vest. I did costume design when I was in my 20's. Then I ordered the patches from sitstay.com, sewed them on, and when I put the vest on, he knows it is time to work.
There are other ways to get service dogs - you can go through a service dog specialty center which could be thousands or train your own dog with certified professional trainer. For a therapy dog they must have enough training to understand and obey your commands and not use the bathroom while inside buildings. I use public transportation a lot and walk Oliver when we are outside and, of course, bring bags and treats (bully bones keep them busy for a long time).
Whatever dog you choose or wherever you chose to train it be sure it is a dog you can handle. I am fully ambulatory and can walk a dog, but my limbs are week, so I needed a smaller dog. He is perfect for me. He also lives longer than any other breed; up to 30 years! So do your research, leave any outside information and myths you have heard about any breed and do what works for you!
Good luck and happy dog hunting!
Meds and how they interact
As I mentioned earlier, I take adderol for fatigue. I also take Paxil. It works great for anxiety and fatigue, and all the doctors support it. Dr. Corboy caught the fact that I have anxiety when I told him I take Xanax for plane rides. He would not give me Xanax to sleep, he said Xanax is for plane rides only and other times I have severe anxiety, or situations which may cause me severe anxiety; and that I needed to learn self hypnosis and other means. I did not even use it for the breast sonogram which I was beside myself about, or the cardiologist visit below.
Later I complained to my GP I was awakened frequently at night due to spasticity in my arms and legs, then I was unable to sleep afterward. She prescribed Clonazepam which is is for my spasticity in my arms and legs that used to torture me at night. Spasticity is when your
muscles stiffen and feel like you have a "charlie horse". It is very painful. Now I sleep well. Gabapentin also makes you feel relaxed, but it is for nerve pain and seizures, and I take it as well.
So at this time I am taking 100mg Gabapentin, Clonazepam and drinking 5-7 espresso type beverages in the morning; then a shot of Copaxone at night.
As I mentioned, I went home to Florida for Christmas and was having pretty frequent heart palpitations. I was there for almost a month and when I got back, I immediately went to my GP who did an echo and said my rhythm had changed and she ordered a halter and I set an appointment with the cardiologist for a week after I turned the halter in.
I went to the cardiologist and had the entire workup done - echo, sonogram (by a strapping young man of 32 who was feeling my breasts (for the sonogram) but it felt great!!! Silver lining - when I saw that handsome young man who was to do it, all anxiety went away : ). Plus they let me have Oliver, which is really what he is for - doggy Xanax. He now has his vest and certifications, so he can go with me anywhere. He was so great; when they put the IV in (which I have tons of anxiety about), he knew to come up and lay his head on my shoulder, look me in the eyes while I petted him.
Then I saw the cardiologist, who was knowledgeable in everything from how all the drugs I was taking interact (even how they effect sexual function!!) Here is what I learned (this was before I was prescribed adderol):
1) Copaxone causes heart palpitations. What!!! It is the best on the market. She asked if I wanted to change, I flatly said"not a chance!"
2) Coffee causes palpitations and can worsen if combined with any other drug that causes it. Right on - I knew this as I smoked for many years and thought it was the smoking. It was both. Now, I had a 15 year career in restaurant management, part of which I spent working for Seattle's Best Coffee and Starbucks. I also lived in Seattle for 5 years, and coffee was more prized than alcohol. Believe it baby! I was drinking it 24-7 and my tolerance is the highest possible. I now carry the Via with me and am never without. She asked me to give up coffee. Uh, another no. Can you do half and half? Yes. So I get half regular and half decaf ground into a pound and I bought decaf Via and do half and half with those.
3) Adderol, which was prescribed that day and she spoke with my GP about, she told me would give me the most palpitations. She told me Provigil was non-narcotic and worked well. I agreed, until I found out the price. So, here is what I did.
I went to my GP and asked her if I could take the 100mg of Gabapentin, 1 mg of Clonazepam, drink the half and half coffee and asked how it would interact. She said it was fine, and that lots of people get agitated by adderol and the Clonazepam will offset that.
So now I have energy and stamina and no agitation, along with no pain thanks to the Gabapentin. As soon as I get a job or SSDI I will switch to Provigil as the long term effects of adderol may be bad. After all, it is an amphetamine salt!
One more suggestion on drugs prescribed. When you go to your pharmacy, ask for a consult. Especially when getting a new drug. Ask them to look over your list on the computer and tell you how they may all interact. That is what they are there for. Pharmacists know better than anyone how these drugs interact as they make them.
Good luck and have a wonderfilled weekend!
Cristen
Fatigue *sigh*
Good afternoon, fellow MS er's and family members of the same:
Before I was diagnosed I used to be known to sigh quite frequently, and most people thought I was bored or being rude. Now I know why.
Before I was diagnosed I used to be known to sigh quite frequently, and most people thought I was bored or being rude. Now I know why.
I am sure after your diagnosis you got all those "aha" moments when you remembered all the symptoms in a vacuum that got diagnosed as other issues. I got diagnosed with migraines for blindness in my right eye in 2003, stress for right side numbness in 1996, severe emotional problems for emotional lability, anxiety for bladder urgency, and the list goes on.
I have the worst fatigue known to MS called "lassitude fatigue". Basically, you are sleepy (you feel drugged) and can fall asleep anywhere. Until recently, I had no idea I had this. I thought fatigue was muscle related. There is the type that makes you feel drained, which I also get, and you want to fall over like a tree, but I always thought it was my menses that caused it. I also have a "short circuiting " fatigue that causes limb weakness. This is why I got a small dog as a service dog; I am unable to handle dogs over 10 lbs - and working out does not make the limb stronger, but helps with balance and falling.
Here are a few examples: I went to Florida for Christmas. I stayed at my father's and we got up and ready around noon on Christmas day to go to Palm Beach to meet with mother and one of my brothers. The trip took an hour and my father and I were talking and he looked over and I was asleep. Concerned, he said he allowed me to sleep till noon. I told him I was exhausted.
Throughout the day and night, I was fighting my eyelids, even with caffeine (which I drank 5-7 cups of espresso type coffee per day). We went home, I slept, and the next day felt well rested.
I took the LSAT on February 5th. With coffee I fell asleep. I would wake up when my pencil fell. I even went to bubble in answers and would fall asleep as my pencil hit the paper. Lucky for me the test was administered incorrectly, so I get another shot.
I went to the nurse practitioner, who I have already gleamed about her awesomeness, and she said I had a few choices, but we started on adderol. 20 mg did not do the trick, but I have been doing better with 30-40. The irony is that she told me not to take it after 1 pm and I do, and still fall asleep by 10 pm!
There are other treatments as well. Pilots take Provigil, but when you have only generic drugs on your insurance plan, it is a very expensive drug. From what I hear, it is great, though.
The scoop
Non-stimulant meds:
Symmetrel - has anti-viral effects and may turn skin blue;
Antidepressants for those who may or may not be depressed: Prozac, Paxil (which I take for fatigue and anxiety) and Zoloft (highly recommended by my docs);
Moldafini (Provigil): Used by pilots on long flights, non narcotic but VERY expensive. It is a neurochemical which has a unique mode of action shown to decrease fatigue and is the most popularly used.
Stimulant meds:
Can be habit forming, which you would need to speak with your doc about:
Adderol or generically Amphetamine salts combo:
Used mainly for focus in ADD in teens and adults;
Cylert: aka Pemoline;
Ritalin: Used for ADD in younger children;
Dexadrine: aka Dextroamphetamine.
Again, these should be used with caution as they can be habit forming. My doctors advise rest (well timed naps), antidepressant meds and stimulants as needed.
I have learned ways to conserve energy by taking breaks and doing NOTHING, meditation, yoga and low impact exercise.
Also, anytime you see your nurse practitioner, remeber to ask her for books and other materials on MS. They usually get these to give to patients as support materials. Copaxone offers a doctor visit checklist (as well as a travel one) to bring to the doc. They will often take it from me and read down the list and answer line by line. You can use it to document falls, fatigue or any other symptoms that are bothersome.
Good luck and remember to visit the sites above; they have an avalanche of info just for you!
Cristen
My docs and resources for you
Good morning fellow MS'ers;
I was fortunate enough to get into the University of Colorado Neurosciences team of doctors after my initial diagnosis. These folks really know their stuff, and head up all research, travel around the country and are professors (it is a teaching hospital). If you get with any Neurosciences team, find a teaching hospital in your area. You will not regret it.
This is a handy site for you to read up and coming everything related to MS. Both my doctor (John R. Corboy) and Vollmer established this center. It has resources such as attorneys to help patients with paperwork and tests to get SSDI for clients, social worker Pat Daly for counseling or referrals, newsletters, and long term and life insurance professionals who work with MS patients only. All at no charge.
Click on the article by Pat Daly, LCSW, Summer 2009 (PDF) "It's Just the Tip of the Iceberg: A New Paradigm for MS" where she interviews one of my doctors. It gives you the latest up to date studies on MS by my team of doctors. Dr. Vollmer explains that remission is not really remission; your disease just becomes invisible again.
As for my symptoms, which are quite invisible if you look at my pictures, I have the following: Lassiter fatigue (I fall asleep anywhere as if I have not slept in days, worst type); Bowel dysfunction (I cannot have a movement without a laxative but I take fiber daily as well as acidophilus); Bladder dysfunction (urgency and unable to empty bladder); severe anxiety; severe nerve pain headaches and backaches; left leg weakness (sometimes I trip); upper arm fatigue in both arms; and before I knew I had MS I had a symptom called emotional lability, which you can read about here:
Which by the way is another great tool for MSer's. You fill out all the information and print a doctor visit sheet with all medications, symptoms, questions and it shows your progression so you can follow it. I love it.
I feel blessed to have these doctors as my own. I now see all my doctors there; from cardiologists to mammography to my general practitioner. My GP did an internship with MS patients and know exactly what I need and can understand where I am coming from. They truly are amazing.
I will stop here as I know we have difficulties sitting and reading long diatribes. I will do my next posting on fatigue, management and drugs that can help.
Cristen
Thursday, February 25, 2010
One hurdle over, another to jump
MS is quite the disease. It reminds me of those rubber trees in Florida that grew and took over your yard, Eventually, if you did not remove them, the roots came up through your house and cause foundation problems.
That's what MS does. It gets into every part of your life and shakes your foundation. What used to be small challenges become large ones and the large ones seem larger.
As previously mentioned, I have a case against my former employer for discrimination. The blessing is that I found an attorney that will represent me on a contingency basis. The percentages are different based on if we just go to mediation or court. Court is expensive. Mediation would be ordered if the commission finds in my favor; then he has to settle with me.
This past week I got an appeal to my unemployment rights from him.Because I volunteered with the legal rights here in Denver regularly, I had an attorney in place. My old boss had filed a late appeal, so I knew it was a possibility; just did not want it to get granted. So when I got the news in the mail, it rattled my cage. After I swore and wished him dead, I calmed down. I decided that because he admitted to touching me unwantingly (civil name for assault), I would call the DA to see if I could get the case re-opened based on the transcript, the judge's findings and orders and the record.
In his rebuttal to my award, he stated repeatedly that I quit the job. But I gave him his keys back based on an accommodation I asked for weeks before, and told him that. He still insists that I quit; and insisted as he assaulted me out the door. We had a long standing stare down about who would be fired or quit first, and I was not giving in. I would not quit because I had a disability that did not affect my job performance.
I had an interesting discussion with the DA.I was never quite sure why they told me I could be charged with trespassing. We talked for a few minutes and she said the case was ultimately dropped and closed. I then asked her what reasoning she relied on that I trespassed when I was in a federally insured building after hours and he had to let me out as I relinquished my keys. She told me that all the employees and the attorney told her I was fired and refused to leave the building. I thanked her and hung up.
The man is a jackass. When I get the offense report, his quitting theory will be blown out of the water, and he may get cited for lying to 3 officers of the court. The short of it is, I am happy, relieved and less stressed knowing he lied.
I really do have to trust the universe more than I do. It really does take care of me.
That's what MS does. It gets into every part of your life and shakes your foundation. What used to be small challenges become large ones and the large ones seem larger.
As previously mentioned, I have a case against my former employer for discrimination. The blessing is that I found an attorney that will represent me on a contingency basis. The percentages are different based on if we just go to mediation or court. Court is expensive. Mediation would be ordered if the commission finds in my favor; then he has to settle with me.
This past week I got an appeal to my unemployment rights from him.Because I volunteered with the legal rights here in Denver regularly, I had an attorney in place. My old boss had filed a late appeal, so I knew it was a possibility; just did not want it to get granted. So when I got the news in the mail, it rattled my cage. After I swore and wished him dead, I calmed down. I decided that because he admitted to touching me unwantingly (civil name for assault), I would call the DA to see if I could get the case re-opened based on the transcript, the judge's findings and orders and the record.
In his rebuttal to my award, he stated repeatedly that I quit the job. But I gave him his keys back based on an accommodation I asked for weeks before, and told him that. He still insists that I quit; and insisted as he assaulted me out the door. We had a long standing stare down about who would be fired or quit first, and I was not giving in. I would not quit because I had a disability that did not affect my job performance.
I had an interesting discussion with the DA.I was never quite sure why they told me I could be charged with trespassing. We talked for a few minutes and she said the case was ultimately dropped and closed. I then asked her what reasoning she relied on that I trespassed when I was in a federally insured building after hours and he had to let me out as I relinquished my keys. She told me that all the employees and the attorney told her I was fired and refused to leave the building. I thanked her and hung up.
The man is a jackass. When I get the offense report, his quitting theory will be blown out of the water, and he may get cited for lying to 3 officers of the court. The short of it is, I am happy, relieved and less stressed knowing he lied.
I really do have to trust the universe more than I do. It really does take care of me.
Monday, February 22, 2010
Your legal rights and MS
The last post has brought me to this subject as it is just as important as the medication you take every day and your overall general health.
Legal rights concern insurance issues, handling debt, disability (SSDI), dealing with taxes, working with doctors and lawyers, medical directives, your rights and responsibilities, family law, job discrimination, property, powers, and personal choice. Whew!
Since the last post was about employment discrimination against me, that is where I will start. By the way, I will not bore you with an entire string of these legal bloggings; I will throw them in as needed when I deal with them in my life. Since I am also a paralegal and have worked in this area as well as the other areas I will discuss, I had less difficulty understanding my legal rights.
The first thing to remember is that it is your responsibility to check with your local civil rights commission to find out what your rights are. For example, in my job, I had to file a complaint with the local civil rights chapter because my employer had under 15 employees. If your employer has 15 or more employees, then you file with the local chapter of the EEOC, which allows you more retribution. In my state, I am only entitled to back pay.
After you find that out, you must decide if you need any accommodations and what they are. The accommodations cannot be a burden to the employer's business. For example, adding special equipment for you only is a burden. Adding equipment that is required by law is not.
You have no legal duty to disclose your disability to your employer unless it would make you unable to perform the job satisfactorily. If you want to be a stock boy at a supermarket and cannot lift over 10 lbs and the job requires you be able to lift 50, the employer can turn you down or terminate you.
In my case, I was able to perform the job as it required reading, writing, research, docketing and calendaring, as well as customer interaction. One fine day, I parked in a handicapped spot and the boss noticed. He asked why I was parked there. I told him I had no legal duty to disclose it to him. He asked if it was a fake placard. I repeated myself. He then told me I could not be trusted. That type of behavior is illegal. I decided to tell him I had MS. He then told me I did not look like I had it, he knew people that have it and They were in bad shape.
I then decided to tell the three other employees there and one said she had daughter who had it, which made me feel more at ease. It seemed everyone was fine with it, until the attorney I was working for got so overloaded in cases and became angry with me all the time for directing him on the cases I needed attended to.
The rest of my case is below. I won't repeat it here. My boss was very volatile and was reminded of it often. When I finally left, I was assaulted out of the door, after all the hard work and hours I put in that were extra. Besides filing a restraining order and assault charge against him, I also filed a charge with the local civil rights commission.
I found out a few other things as well. I got an attorney with legal aid for his unemployment appeal (he claims I quit because I gave him his keys and told him I was working 9-5 only and as we were in a federally insured bank building that opened and closed 9-6). He clearly fired me and had asked me to quit several times due to my MS as he thought it "beauty parlor bullshit", he did not have time for it and it was a "bunch of "hoo haa". Also illegal.
He then demanded medical records in front of employees, had discussions with me that were confidential in front of other employees (ADA says they must be manager or administrator of the business), made fun of me and told other employees that I had MS. Illegal. He also told me I needed to quit based on my MS as he felt it was disrupting his firm.
The accomodations I asked for were the following: To give me a few minutes to process his requests (I worked up to 30 cases at a time), although any reasonable person would have asked for that; access to the elevator as I could not climb stairs; and the biggie - no more working over 8 hours a day.
These were all more than reasonable, which he met with disdain and the best ability I have ever seen to be as unreasonable as possible.
So, moral of the story is this: check with your local civil rights division and ask what your rights are at work;
make sure any accomodations you ask for are reasonable and needed;
and if you have an experience similar to mind, you do not go to the court to file charges, you go to the commission and exhaust your administrative remedies first. Be sure to document everything, keep e-mails and any other evidence you may have to file with the commission because they are generally overloaded. After filing, call and get your investigator's name and number (e-mail is best) so you can stay current. You do not need an attorney unless the commission finds in your favor and you go to conciliation. In most states you must file within 180 days of the discrimination and the commission has 270 days to investigate. After that time, you get a right to sue letter and you can file in court. However, court is long and costly so it is best to see if the commission can help you get the result you need.
That's it for now, may yo have a wonderfilled day!
Legal rights concern insurance issues, handling debt, disability (SSDI), dealing with taxes, working with doctors and lawyers, medical directives, your rights and responsibilities, family law, job discrimination, property, powers, and personal choice. Whew!
Since the last post was about employment discrimination against me, that is where I will start. By the way, I will not bore you with an entire string of these legal bloggings; I will throw them in as needed when I deal with them in my life. Since I am also a paralegal and have worked in this area as well as the other areas I will discuss, I had less difficulty understanding my legal rights.
The first thing to remember is that it is your responsibility to check with your local civil rights commission to find out what your rights are. For example, in my job, I had to file a complaint with the local civil rights chapter because my employer had under 15 employees. If your employer has 15 or more employees, then you file with the local chapter of the EEOC, which allows you more retribution. In my state, I am only entitled to back pay.
After you find that out, you must decide if you need any accommodations and what they are. The accommodations cannot be a burden to the employer's business. For example, adding special equipment for you only is a burden. Adding equipment that is required by law is not.
You have no legal duty to disclose your disability to your employer unless it would make you unable to perform the job satisfactorily. If you want to be a stock boy at a supermarket and cannot lift over 10 lbs and the job requires you be able to lift 50, the employer can turn you down or terminate you.
In my case, I was able to perform the job as it required reading, writing, research, docketing and calendaring, as well as customer interaction. One fine day, I parked in a handicapped spot and the boss noticed. He asked why I was parked there. I told him I had no legal duty to disclose it to him. He asked if it was a fake placard. I repeated myself. He then told me I could not be trusted. That type of behavior is illegal. I decided to tell him I had MS. He then told me I did not look like I had it, he knew people that have it and They were in bad shape.
I then decided to tell the three other employees there and one said she had daughter who had it, which made me feel more at ease. It seemed everyone was fine with it, until the attorney I was working for got so overloaded in cases and became angry with me all the time for directing him on the cases I needed attended to.
The rest of my case is below. I won't repeat it here. My boss was very volatile and was reminded of it often. When I finally left, I was assaulted out of the door, after all the hard work and hours I put in that were extra. Besides filing a restraining order and assault charge against him, I also filed a charge with the local civil rights commission.
I found out a few other things as well. I got an attorney with legal aid for his unemployment appeal (he claims I quit because I gave him his keys and told him I was working 9-5 only and as we were in a federally insured bank building that opened and closed 9-6). He clearly fired me and had asked me to quit several times due to my MS as he thought it "beauty parlor bullshit", he did not have time for it and it was a "bunch of "hoo haa". Also illegal.
He then demanded medical records in front of employees, had discussions with me that were confidential in front of other employees (ADA says they must be manager or administrator of the business), made fun of me and told other employees that I had MS. Illegal. He also told me I needed to quit based on my MS as he felt it was disrupting his firm.
The accomodations I asked for were the following: To give me a few minutes to process his requests (I worked up to 30 cases at a time), although any reasonable person would have asked for that; access to the elevator as I could not climb stairs; and the biggie - no more working over 8 hours a day.
These were all more than reasonable, which he met with disdain and the best ability I have ever seen to be as unreasonable as possible.
So, moral of the story is this: check with your local civil rights division and ask what your rights are at work;
make sure any accomodations you ask for are reasonable and needed;
and if you have an experience similar to mind, you do not go to the court to file charges, you go to the commission and exhaust your administrative remedies first. Be sure to document everything, keep e-mails and any other evidence you may have to file with the commission because they are generally overloaded. After filing, call and get your investigator's name and number (e-mail is best) so you can stay current. You do not need an attorney unless the commission finds in your favor and you go to conciliation. In most states you must file within 180 days of the discrimination and the commission has 270 days to investigate. After that time, you get a right to sue letter and you can file in court. However, court is long and costly so it is best to see if the commission can help you get the result you need.
That's it for now, may yo have a wonderfilled day!
Saturday, February 20, 2010
Wherever I go, there I am...and I am a spiritual being having a human experience.
I have to remember this every time I get down about my MS. What is my purpose? Why am I here? I still have not figured that out, but I desperately want to.
The past month and a half have been eye openers for me. I get the help I need when I ask for it, however I did not expect on thing. And it has twisted my life so badly, I am not sure what to do.
When I worked for a certain employer, he was very insensitive to my MS. That is being mild. Eventually, I left him at his request, as he assaulted me out the door. During the time I worked for him, I asked fore certain accommodations. Before I did so I consulted with an employment attorney in the county and of course read the rules and statutes thoroughly myself. The more I asked for, the more agitated he got. it was "beauty parlor bullshit" and "hoo haa" to him. He told me I never gave him any diagnosis to prove it; and I of course had given it to the person who held herself out to be a manager or administrator of his firm. She denied it but then found it.
I asked for a few things. They were reasonable and were not a burden on his business. I am a paralegal (just took the LSAT). In this particular attorney's practice, I managed all of his family law cases (18-25 cases), his civil cases (3-4) and criminal cases (3-4). in a usual week, he also had 5-7 bankruptcy cases he showed in court for and was constantly on the phone with "money calls" (potentially new cases). Potentially new cases took precedence over current cases. He was a very difficult attorney to work for for many reasons, and this was one of many.
In March I was hired by him to run his family law cases. I was told to work 9-5 or 10-6. The building was a federal bank building and opened at 9 and closed at 6, so I had a choice of the two. The job was almost perfect; I lived 3 blocks away and I was able to bring my cat. That did not work out well; she often got frightened by all the traffic in the office, so I stopped bringing her.
At the time he had over 20 many of which were neglected and some he did not show for because they were not calendared in the previous months before that. His favorite assistant, Jan, tried to tell me what to do, but she was so incompetent I entertained her words only. For example, she told me that one particular case was waiting for something on the plaintiff side. She advised me to put it away as we had other matters. A few weeks later the client wanted to know where the attorney was; they had permanent orders that day. I never spoke to another person about family law again.
This particular attorney also had an obsession with making fun of people. the week after he hired me he asked why I was parked in a handicapped spot. I told him by law I did not have to disclose it. He immediately told me he could not trust me. I decided to tell him I have MS. I then told the 3 other employees in the office. I knew if I did not, he would. Why? When he was looking for a bankruptcy assistant, the one he wanted was great, he told us, except the former employer disclosed she had a disability. Jan then found out what it was and told the entire office. In secret, one by one, of course, and I would not let that happen.
So, when he was furnished with the diagnosis I gave his "administrator", he then told me he wanted other records pertaining to my disability. The first accommodation I asked for was that he give me 5-6 minutes to process any requests. He said he would do it, but never did. The second was that I was given keys to the building so I could come and go when there was work to be done. Often I arrived at 7 am and left at 9 pm or later. I worked for 5 attorneys and handled twice the work and never left after 6 pm. I wanted to go back to working 8 hours, like the rest of the firm. He was always behind on my cases and it held me back. Then we would file last minute and that was a stressful drag.
He used to yell at me a lot; calling me stupid, I did not listen, and that I depended on him too much. He wanted me to sign pleadings and motions for him. Yet that was illegal, and would hurt him more than me but I was unwilling to do it. He hated family law, therefore hated me and so did the firm. I was a distraction, although I had a heavy caseload and pertinent documents that needed review and his signature as approval.
In August we began to have personality conflicts. Here I am watching his back and he just had no interest. I was not a lawyer, yet I soon learned the people who malpracticed law for him became his favorites, even though I re-wrote his rep and fee agreements, explained the reasoning for COLTAF accounts and had clients come in and either sign rep and fee agreements or re-do them all together to keep him out of trouble.
Moral: I got a cognitive test, aka neuropsychological test. Not only was it a new test, it was something I was billed over 3,250.00 for and it was the one thing I never thought it would be: a bomb. It was all sorts of test rolled into one, including an IQ test and you did it over a 2 day period. I had not taken any of the tests in 30 years, making it suspect to me.
Also, read the statutes in your state or consult with an employment lawyer. Most will speak to you for free, and if not, call your county's legal aid.
I left the firm before I was able to give it to him, however, when my father applied for health insurance with a rider that you draw on (the death benefit) no one would even consider me. Further, the doctor who administered the test, refused to sign an accommodations letter for the LSAT or anyone, even though that was the reason I got it!! Why pay for it, then?
Be careful about the tests you take. I am currently unemployed and on unemployment. I have taken the LSAT for law school, but was denied accommodations on that one test. My hope is that the health care bill gets passed and I can get the rider and life insurance. If not, all I have is state help. Better than nothing, it falls short of many of the costs that I may encounter in life.
As for my life's path, my purpose, it is still yet to be revealed. I will post my ideas next.
That's it for now, may every day find you happy and healthy! And as my father says - look up!
Monday, February 15, 2010
Deservability
My issue has always been deservability. I just don't feel you deserve the very best in life. I have been reading "You Can Heal Your Life" by Louise Hays and listening to her 101 Affirmations on CD. They have done wonders for me, especially after all I am going through with my health. Another thing - I weighed 160 last year and brought myself to 118 by refusing to be overweight. MSer's have bad balance, therefore become weeble wobbles if they are overweight. I did something amazing. The prior year Erin and I went on the Atkins diet. I did well, even though I could not eat dairy or meat. However I hit a wall since I did not exercise. So I ate the complex carbs and maintained the weight until I got back on sugar. I fell twice and hurt myself badly, then twisted both my ankles. I looked horrible. One ankle is still healing.
One night I watched the Biggest Loser and how those huge people get up there half naked and without pride are willing to do what it takes to change their lives. So I stopped sugar. Then I got back on fiber, acidophilus, and complex carbs. Then I bought Jillian Anderson's DVD, "No More Trouble Zones." I did it 3 days a week and suddenly here I am, a size 2 again. I feel great. I never fall. I feel better about myself. And as a bonus, I look sexy as hell!! I got the DVD at Costco, then I got 2 others and Erin bought it on Wii Fit Plus for me for Christmas.
Then a magical thing happened. Erin started to exercise. She started to lose weight. She started to feel better. Thursday she got lap band surgery, and she is recovering. I feel so inspired, but I am the inspire-er!
Yes, I took the test. It is called the Law School Admissions Test, hence, LSAT. I had a hard time, but my psychic friend Dee told me I did better than I will expect. Let's hope so.I get the score on March 1. Say a prayer on that day. Law school is all I want. I don't even care about a man as much as that. If I do not do well, I will take it again. The school I am applying to in Denver does not average the scores. I also have the best Neuro-team here and get all sorts of benes.
So if I get a low score on the LSAT, I will study at every opportunity. I have all the materials. While cooking, eating, bathing, before sleeping. I would love for you to have a purpose in your life so you do not get distracted. I have to remember, deservability. You deserve the very best in life.
Shopping! When I go to Wal-Mart I go with a gift card. My bills get paid first. I am on unemployment, so the account rarely gets touched. I am on my way to SSDI so I can get through law school. No one has money to help dig me out of things now. I have to be super careful about my money. I go there for needs when I do have money, but Costco is better. With Erin on a liquid diet for 6 weeks, we have 2 fridges full of food. So I am good. Plus, I got everything and more for Christmas. I Phone, GPS; the list goes on; not to mention the $5,000.00 the last boyfriend spent on clothes and shoes for me. I am good.
My health: I got a booby scare with recent mammography. They did a sonogram but found 2 swollen lymph nodes. I am getting a biopsy this Friday. Say a prayer at 1 pm your time. My family knows except for dad. he is so worried about me. I tell him everything, but this one I left to my brother Marc, who got cancer and Richie. MS: My cognitive abilities seem to be declining, but I can't say; I got a baseline Neuropsychology test and should probably do another. I was declined for long term care and my father is doing his best to get a policy so my brothers do not end up with me someday; mainly the costs and the care involved.
Valentine's day was pretty good, despite the missing boyfriend. My dad sent me a dozen multi-colored roses and I was thrilled. Next guy will have to live up to that and the unconditional love he has for me.
Mom is the same old story. Never called, sent nothing, has no idea what's happening with me. Does not really care. She is writing a book. I told her to keep me out of it. I have stopped hating her. I just accept that she is the best that it gets for me, and I have great friends, like Erin, who fill in the spaces.
I even tried talking with a social worker like her and she was just so awful. She told me law school was not in my future. I told her I carried 4.0's in legal studies my last 2 years of school, one of which I was already diagnosed! She got angry and hung up on me, told me I was annoying her. At first my feelings were hurt, but that woman was caustic and probably did not like her job. I would hate to see what she does with the terminally ill!
Stay busy, study, and look up. It makes you feel better.
Sunday, February 7, 2010
Of course denial is a river in Egypt, silly!
The worst part of this journey has been my family. Wait, scratch that; they have been the worst part of my life's journey; starting with my mother. Every time I talked to her all I heard was that "we do not have enough information. MS is a manageable disease, just like AIDS. Wow, that was encouraging. My brother Richie called and the first thing he asked was, "is it hereditary?" Always so self absorbed. My brother John acts as if no one exists. He said the same thing my mother said, only he did it more dismissively. And he wonders why he can't get a date! My brother Marc did his best, considering we were not there for him when he got cancer and he has a wife and two children.
My father has been the rock. He learned what he could and started looking for long term care plans in August. We found one but it was too expensive for me. We are still looking a year later, and I found a man at the Rocky Mountain MS Center who deals with these things. His wife died due to complications related to MS and he had no coverage and was working night and day to take care of her.
Dad calls every day, even if the super bowl is on. Even if he has a super busy day, he calls. He loves me unconditionally and all I can say is that I HOPE I can find a man in my life that treats me the same way. Minus the shut up and stop talking and the irritability. He can't help it though, he has type one diabetes.
One thing I can tell you in this blog is I have no resources or advice on family. All I know is that they can be brutal. Some may be understanding. But no matter how many therapists, neurophsychs, doctors and lawyers tell my mother I have a serious illness, she refuses to acknowledge it. She is a therapist herself and knows everything about everything. No matter how much material I give her on my disease and tell her they are from my doctors, the top doctors in the nation, she dismisses them with ignorant statements such as, "this is just a reason for you to be taken care of. This is just attention getting. This is ACOA stuff. She has no idea that doctors are diagnosing children at 18 months now. It is more than a possibility that any behavioral problems I had as a child were due to this disease.
I have to end here, but will add more tomorrow.
My father has been the rock. He learned what he could and started looking for long term care plans in August. We found one but it was too expensive for me. We are still looking a year later, and I found a man at the Rocky Mountain MS Center who deals with these things. His wife died due to complications related to MS and he had no coverage and was working night and day to take care of her.
Dad calls every day, even if the super bowl is on. Even if he has a super busy day, he calls. He loves me unconditionally and all I can say is that I HOPE I can find a man in my life that treats me the same way. Minus the shut up and stop talking and the irritability. He can't help it though, he has type one diabetes.
One thing I can tell you in this blog is I have no resources or advice on family. All I know is that they can be brutal. Some may be understanding. But no matter how many therapists, neurophsychs, doctors and lawyers tell my mother I have a serious illness, she refuses to acknowledge it. She is a therapist herself and knows everything about everything. No matter how much material I give her on my disease and tell her they are from my doctors, the top doctors in the nation, she dismisses them with ignorant statements such as, "this is just a reason for you to be taken care of. This is just attention getting. This is ACOA stuff. She has no idea that doctors are diagnosing children at 18 months now. It is more than a possibility that any behavioral problems I had as a child were due to this disease.
I have to end here, but will add more tomorrow.
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